Myth 03: Homeschool kids are too sheltered.
Sheltered
adjective;
protected from difficulties or unpleasant realities
Shelter
verb;
protect or shield from something harmful
There are many different elements to consider when referring to a sheltered child. We've all witnessed circumstances when children are provided too much protection––often referred to as helicopter or snowplow parents; hovering closely to ensure no person, place or thing could even come close to harming our child. Plowing a path of no resistance so that they can live a stress-free life with no hurdles, no speed bumps––living on cruise control.
But realistically, the world is cruel. It's shark-infested waters out there! It would be a massive disservice to our children if we shielded them from the realities of the world and left them completely unprepared to face challenges on their own.
The key here, though, is that as parents, we have the ability to filter this reality with a lens that aligns with our values. And more importantly, when the majority of a child's time is spent in the home with family, we have the opportunity to gradually expose them to different subjects in an age-appropriate manner. The world isn't going to be so gentle, and it doesn't care about our values.
Let's take bullying for example. Of course we all have to confront mean people at some point, maybe even often. Does this mean throwing children to the wolves at a young age will toughen them up? Sure, they might develop some thick skin(they might not!), but how much more resilient would they be if they were first equipped with effective tools to communicate, the ability to diffuse escalation and offer conflict resolution, and the time to develop their self-image? They absolutely need some shelter, isn't that what parents are for, after all? A shelter that provides tools, responsibility, purpose, and guidance—which in turn will build confidence.
You've probably heard the Jim Rohn quote, "You're the average of the five people you spend the most time with." This doesn't only apply to adults! Imagine if the people our children are spending a significant amout of time with were vindictive, manipulative, and selfish individuals versus spending most of their time being modeled behaviors that you, as a family, value and hope to instill in them as adults. They will learn through a living example to do the same. Public school isn't the only place where our children can learn to be resilient and face adversity with boldness and determination.
It ultimately comes down to intentionally finding a balance, We don't want them so sheltered that they have an unrealistic expectation of society, but allowing any and all exposure to harmful things won't serve them either. Pods are a great solution if this is a concern for your family. Your child gets to build interpersonal skills with different temperaments and personalities, while having the security of a group who has the same core values.
Books
Thirteen Things Strong Kids Do by: Amy Morin
Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by: Angela Duckworth
How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and The Hidden Power of Character by: Paul Tough
Podcasts
The Nick Bare Podcast | Building the Next Generation of Leaders with Matt Beaudreau
Articles/Websites
Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance- TED talk by Angela Duckworth. She was a 7th grade math teacher and discussed the "grit factor" she observed between successful students and students who struggled.
How to Build Resilient Children- TED talk by Teresse Lewis. Lessons that children need to learn in order be resilient!